Memorial Service arrangements

A memorial service will take place in Marie's honor on Sunday, February 24, 2008 at 2:00 pm at Crockett Springs United Methodist Church, located at Camp Alta Mons. Services will be led by Reverend Doyle Wyatt. Following the service there will be a meal located in the Camp Alta Mons dining hall. Flowers can be sent to 2780 Crockett Springs Rd. Shawsville, VA 24162. Correspondence can be sent to Marie's parents, Jim and Pisa Opetaia-Williamson at 3830 Zenith Pl Durham, NC 27705.

This is a celebration of life and color is appropriate. Marie saw life in color and we would want you to celebrate her life in the same way by wearing color.

I am blessed

Writing in honor of Marie Lisa Opetaia-Williamson

She was loved. She was blessed. She was Marie Opetaia-Williamson. She was a daughter, sister, and love of a lifetime. She was unique and proud of it. She was an individual who was part of a community of wonderful people. Marie was absolutely beautiful in every way possible. This morning we lost her to her battle with leukemia. We ask that at this time that all who loved her and knew her to take a moment and remember the wonderful things about Marie.

There will be plans for her memorial service to come and I will post them for you all. May God bless you and keep you and hold you close in his loving arms during this time of remembrance.

Love,
Sheri O-W

Don't worry, Just send love my way :)

"Blessed are the little joys in life.
They have the power to keep us going
when we don't think we can."

- from ''Eat Your Peas: For Tough Times"

So, after such an exciting last few days, we thought things were calming down. Not so much. The oxygen level in my blood is very, very low so they've got me on the tubes up the nose thing because without it my oxygen level drops way below 90%, which is very bad. Good news: I don't have pneumonia. Bad news: they still don't know exactly what kind of infection is going on. They tried a bronchoscopy the other day to try to look around in my lungs and flush them to see exactly what is going on. That lasted all of 2 seconds and they pulled the tube out and said they couldn't do it. And I was like, are you sure you don't want to try one more time? and the lady looked at me and said, ma'am, you turned blue. so i said OH. Yeah let's not try that again. But tomorrow, my doctors are going to see if they would be willing to completely sedate me and try it again, because they desperately need to narrow their options so they can target the right thing with the right medicines.

Anyway, my kidneys aren't doing a great job of filtering, so they have me on lots of liquids to keep them safe. The bad news is I'm swollen up like a balloon. I swear I'm carrying around 20 lbs. of extra fluid weight. My legs last night were so huge I literally didn't recognize my own body. I thought someone had replaced them with tree trunks...very ugly ones at that. They're giving me a steroid, as well, to help my kidneys do their job better. They tried a gentler version on me tonight then what they had been giving me and about 1 minute later I couldn't breathe. The weird thing is I was worried that the nurses wouldn't get here before I passed out more than the fact that I couldn't breathe, but they were right on target, cut off the medicine flow, switched me to a mask and I was back to good in seconds. Oh, and back to me feeling like a marshmallow, they can't give me lasiks to make me have to go all of the time because then my kidneys wouldn't have enough fluid and they would be damaged. So, the steroid that's supposed to push things along has been working really well and we're doing it the safe way. My legs are now 2/3 the tree trunk size they were before and I can actually see some tendons in my hands, but not my feet yet. I asked my dad if this is what I'm gonna look like if I ever get pregnant and he was like 'there's a chance' and I was like 'ugh...but it would still be worth it'.

So, I thought I was gonna just squat down and pick up something and I found myself instantly on my butt. I decided it actually felt good sitting just where I was until I realized I had to get up...uhhh....hmmm. I failed miserably at just pushing off the floor like I normally would, but I didn't give up. I turned around and reached for the two railings on the bed and slowly pulled myself up. I felt like I was lifting up the world. It's amazing the energy and natural motion I lose without even realizing it.

I have my parents here...although they missed the allergic reaction to the steroid (which I'm kind of happy about b/c I think my mom wouldn't leave my bedside for a week straight, she'd be so worried about me). And Mike is worried about me, so he's going to try to be down here early Monday to see that I'm still around and everything is going to be okay. I feel like everything is going as smoothly as possible, especially considering that the docs are having trouble narrowing things down. They're on top of everything. I've had docs, nurses, pulmonary, infectious diseases, and the oxygen control people in and out of my room ALL day to make sure things are okay and if they're not, they find something to hopefully make it better. OH. I also had and EKG done and my heart looks fine, so thank God for that. It's been through so much, sometimes I wonder if one day it's gonna be like 'I'm outta here'. But it keeps hanging strong through all of this - Go heart, Go!

Don't worry too much about me. The worrying never helps. Just think positive, keep me in your heart and prayers and thoughts and I'll be fine. All I need is love ;) (and maybe a good strawberry margarita, but that is WAY down the road for me)

short one

Hey everyone, sorry I haven't posted lately. Since saturday I've had all kinds of tests run on me. Overall, things are great ('cause I WILL walk out of this place or run if I had the energy) just little glitches here and there. A bunch of different doctors came by to talk to me about my symptoms,; every test they wanted done was done in less than 24 hours. They're really on their toes here! So, I do have some type of amoneia and I askedd them why I got pneumonia when i was exercising frequently. They think it may be because I'm retaining fluids since I get a lot of different liquid medicines constantly every day. He said the difference is that, with me exercising, they were able to catch the symptoms at an early stage. If I had not been exercising, at this point it would have been severe and very difficult to deal with. So the good news is if my doctors can get me recovered pretty fast, then I might actually be out of the hospital in 10 days! Oh and must I not forget, the gift of the day:


This, believe it or not, is from Mike. Yes, it is a white and pink striped gorilla with a purple face, ears and belly (with sexy beast on it...lol). Attached to him a a blown up balloon in the shape of turtle that says 'you're so special'. Anyway, off to bed. I hope this makes sense 'cause i feel i'm on a magic carpet at the moment.

Sleepy, Sick and Seeing Double

Hey everyone! I hope no one is freaking out because I haven't posted in a few days. Friday I started feeling kind of 'off' and then I developed a fever and had blood cultures taken, a chest x-ray and a urine test. This all started at 4 in the morning. I couldn't really go back to sleep, so I tossed and turned, plus my nurse told me I needed 2 units of blood and at least 1 bag of platelets. On top of that Mike's parents, my parents, my brother and his girlfriend were coming to visit me. It felt very ironic to me that I would have my worst day here so far and everyone was coming to see me. I started the morning with cramps in my belly that hurt when i sat up straight or turned. Then when I was in the bathroom, just minding my own business, my nose started profusely bleeding, from BOTH nostrils. It was a mess. Mike and his parents were already here and I felt bad that they had to see me at my worst. They left to go find some grub, meanwhile, my family posse pops in to see how I'm doing. Steve and Wendy brought me some YUMMY gifts (chocolate covered macadamia nuts, heck yeah! - secret stash) and a cute stuffed animal frog.


His name is Hermit the Frog ('cause that's what my mom called him last night...lol). And here is my KUB (killer upchuck bucket) conveniently located on my food tray table.


She is my lovely lady in pink every time I need her. I always wondered what those buckets were for, and NOW I know. Needless to say, yesterday was the worst day I've had since I've been here. I didn't even want to move from the bed, I was dozing in and out, but trying to focus on what everyone is saying. Whenever I was alone in the room I would pull the covers up over my head and bury myself in blankets. I was also having blurry vision and feeling shaky, so they put a Scope patch behind my ear and it seems to be helping.

So I actually got through last night drinking 4 bottled waters and recovering from an overwhelming day for me. I got up at 6am to take a shower, had my bed made and I am ready for the world today. I think my body was just telling me to give myself a break on Saturday. Luckily, I wasn't emotionally too down yesterday. I still managed to smile and have conversations and enjoy my visitors. Oh, Friday, during the day, I decided to put all of the cards up on the very teeny board that my bed faces. It cheers me up to constantly be able to see them and know that in every card there are loving messages. On that note, maybe you can enjoy them too.

Lost Food and Lost Hair

Today started early with the food lady practically tossing the daily menu on my bed and saying she would be back in 30 minutes to pick it up. Not so much. She never came back! My nurse came, realized that I had no breakfast and came in with a choice of cereals. I chose Corn Pops and Apple Jacks...I was HUNGRY and the cereal was tasty. I looked at my bed and there was hair everywhere and I couldn't seem to get rid of it. So, I looked like this when I woke up:


And I got frustrated with the hair everywhere, so Edith, the lady who comes in and checks my vitals, changes my bed and all that good stuff, shaved my head for me this afternoon. And it feels sooo much better. Now I'll only have very itty-bitty hairs coming out and it won't bother me as bad. Now I'm part of the G.I. Jane club:


Yes, Rob, bald is hawt! hehehe...I feel a lot cleaner and less like a long haired dog that sheds when it blinks. Maybe Mike will bring me back a cowgirl hat from San Antonio to keep my head warm, or entertain everyone :)

GOOD NEWS: The treadmill is fixed and I rocked it tonight! My feet hurt, but the medicine they are giving me made them hurt less, so it was painful, just not as painful as before. Also, I'm still doing really well. The doctors expected me to start feeling really sick 2 days ago and I'm still the little half samoan chuggin' along. I haven't needed nausea medicine since Friday, which I feel is an accomplishment.

Back to the food issue, not only did I not get breakfast, I never got lunch. So at 2 something I went to the food galley to get some V8 Juice and one of the nurses asked if she could help me. I told her I never got lunch, so she ordered me a pepperoni pizza from downstairs (personal sized...not a ginormous one). And then my nurse came in and apologized and said there was a fight outside between the nurses and the dietitians. They told my nurse, ''well, she got her pizza, right? and my nurse was like...at 3 PM...HELLO...what time do you eat lunch? Anyway, so I unknowingly started some drama today. I just wanted some food! The kitchen lady called and made sure I got my food and took my order for dinner. Feeling guilty??? I think the drama has cooled down, though. Which is good because my parents, sister and Doyle & Frannie (my parent's good friends) stopped by not very shortly after. They just finished moving stuff into the house my parent's are renting (which is where I will be when I escape from here), so they all looked tired. It was good to see everyone, though, and now my parents can visit everyday! (or fairly frequently...no need to go overboard :) ) And thus concludes the end of cancer adventures for the day (I think and hope).

feet, sweating, medicine and love

So, I started out Sunday being fussed at for walking around barefoot, I didn't see the big deal and I wasn't cold. Nonetheless, I put on these great slipper socks? or whatever they are called that I got from Mike's sister, Ashley for Christmas. They're AWESOME. There's about a half inch of fluffiness inside and they make my feet feel sooo good :) I'm having some kind of painful nerve ending issue with the bottom of my feet and palm of my hands, so having these to cushion my feet was a blessing. The doctors said that it's probably from the type of chemo I received, so they put me on some kind of medication that's supposed to help heal them and it seems to be working. My feet aren't painfully on fire anymore. Every time I work out, my feet feel worse and worse, but I'd rather work out and suck it up then get sick because I'm not exercising.
Speaking of exercising, last night I went to walk on the treadmill and it had a piece of paper on it that said BROKEN (in yellow marker that I could barely read)...noooooo! So I reluctantly got on the recumbent machine which kicked my butt, but it's worth it. I am determined to get through this with the least side effects possible.

I had a little bit of trouble sleeping last night...I think I was worried about Mike catching his plane to San Antonio. I called him at 4 am to make sure he was good to go :) and he was. I was worrying for nothing. My blood counts came back very low, so I received two blood transfusions and one platelet transfusion today. They had me hooked up like a cyborg woman with all the stuff they were giving me at once, as you can see below. He's my buddy. Wherever I go he's gonna go.
Most of the day kind of passed by with me in a daze. Between the benadryl and nerve ending medicine, I was struggling to stay awake or at least be able to focus. Doing this blog right now is a little challenging for me, but if that's all I can complain about, it's all good. OH, I forgot. I also got mail today, which is sooo exciting! The Benkerts (neighbors and good friends with Mike's family) sent me this little book called Bedside Blessings and it has something inspirational or thoughtful for each day of the year, which is really cool. Plus, it's tiny and cute. I also got a letter from Ashley, Mike's sister, along with a picture of her pet bunny (really really cuddly looking) and a word search...woohooo (how did she know i liked word searches?)!

I'm like a kid in a candy store when it comes to mail. Plus, it's nice to know that people are thinking about me or praying for me, so thank you all for the support. I'm doing really well because I have so much support. Through your thoughts, prayers, emails, messages, phone calls, gifts and cards I have managed to push myself this far. It gives me no reason to give up and every reason to do everything I can to live life fully until I'm gray-headed and playing with grandchildren. I love you all!

progress and my flippin' hair

the stuffed animal meerkat from my parents, so random and so awesome!

Saturday was pretty uneventful for me. I got to spend most of the day with Mike, but he had homework to work on, so we were together...but kinda not. It was still nice to see him, nonetheless. He DID bring me a chicken biscuit for breakfast :) I don't have much of an appetite, though. Eating for me is more of a function than a desire, but at least I'm still eating. I've been having what seemed like random migraines, but I think we just figured out that it's from one of the immuno-suppressant IV drugs they have me on, so I'll get pre-medicated before I receive it from now on. I didn't work out until evening 'cause my legs feel like jello from my counts and energy being low. I had to slow it down just a little bit on the treadmill. I figured it wouldn't be cool and would probably be pretty embarrassing if I passed out or hurt myself because I was pushing too hard. Then I came back and watched Miss America, which was much more modern this year. The speaker dude sucked though. He kept messing up, forgetting who was who...it wasn't pretty.

I got a little nauseous late last night, but I got medicine before I got sick. This morning I had to get platelets again because I only had 5 platelets left in my entire body. I'm still sort of drowsy right now from the benadryl they give me before transfusion. There's really nothing exciting to say at the moment. I'm waiting on Mike to show up and listening to my aunt's playlist on myspace. The doctors have already come through and are really pleased with how well my body seems to be handling everything, so I guess that's good news. My hair is CRAZY right now! Some of it is coming out, but it has grown out to a point where it wants to try to curl, so I look like a hurricane hit me with the hair flipping in various funky directions...oh well, though :) There's no need to impress anybody.


Yeah, I know it's an unbelievably beautiful picture and you just can't take yours eyes off of it...OR it looks like i just woke up 'cause I'm pretty much still in that feeling of waking up. I'll shower at some point :) Oh, and bert bert, the font size is just for you...hahaha! It's called LARGE, which, by the way, is above Normal :)

Oh Happy Day...

My day started at 6 am today. I got a transfusion of platelets, which are the part of the blood that keeps people from bleeding to death...clots your blood for safety, like if you get cut. The doctor's came in and told me that if I continue in the condition I am in right now then I should have a very boring, but good few weeks here. I'll take boring over exciting...exciting just means trouble. I can feel my blood level dropping, especially when I move around 'cause breathing takes a little bit more energy and I feel like I have a lot less energy. After the doctor's left, I put my headphones on and went back to sleep for a little bit, then I decided to quit being a couch potato and go work out. I think the treadmill and recumbent machine here are going to save my sanity. I get fidgety or bored out of my mind and go work it off. I don't want to be the horrible, muscle-less shape I was in the first time I was diagnosed...it's so hard to get back to normal from that physical state.

Anyway, to the exciting stuff. I'm starting to lose hair now and, believe it or not, I actually lose my nose hairs too, so I'm CONSTANTLY scratching at my nose like I have an obsessive compulsive disorder and I look like Rudolph, but it's all good. I've had really good, talkative nurses today and I've personally been in a really good mood. I think, now that everything is finally happening, I'm able to de-stress and really enjoy just being here. I also got 4 cards in the mail today, which is SO exciting for me! I don't know why, but I love mail, even if I know what it is...it's just fun to get it and it puts me in a good mood. Becky stopped by this evening with her husband, Stan. They are such an easy couple to talk to...very genuine and loving and full of life. Becky made me a mini birthday cake, which is just awesome! AND Mike is coming in tonight, very late, but still, he'll be here and my night nurse doesn't care how long he stays (they're usually pretty strict about visitors being gone by 11 pm) so I'm happy about that :) Overall, it's been a pretty good day. Besides having less energy and headaches because my blood counts are low, I'm feeling pretty good. Just keep thinking about me and praying for me and hopefully I'll cruise on through all of this!

Ups, Downs & Puppies

Yeah, the road gets harder
But it’s not much farther
It’s gonna be alright

You know that it ain’t easy
Please believe me
It’s gonna be alright

Please don’t worry now
It will turn around

~ More Time by Needtobreathe

So that is about how I feel. I've had an up and down day today and, overall, very sentimental. I wrote in my journal and started writing all of these memories and moments that have brought me to this point in my life. Then I started crying because it's so beautiful and so frustrating all at once...very bittersweet. I needed to cry anyway. I don't cry very often about my situation. After the doctors checked me out, I got up and rocked out to some tunes while exercising. I woke up with hot flashes and with my knee and hip joints aching really bad, so the exercise helped a little bit. They started me on a white cell booster shot today called Neupogen which can make my joints ache as well. I get one a day until my counts are good. Yay! Anyway, the good thing about crying is that I felt the need to talk to someone, so I called up my parents and my sister and my best friend growing up and had some really good conversations. I was alright by the end of it. My mom was so sweet. She called me back not even 30 minutes later to make sure I was okay still. It's always embarrassing to do the snotty-nosed, crying your eyeballs out calls...oh well :)

I really want a puppy and obviously can't have one right now, but if I could, this one would be it...



He is a pug/cockerspaniel mix and THE cutest dog EVER! I could love him forever and ever and he looks so snuggly :) I read that having a pet companion can extend a person's life by 7 years...I wouldn't mind that at all...hahaha. So, yeah, I actually do sit here and plan things for after I'm outta this place. I'm ready to move on with my life, get engaged, get married, have bambinos...all of that would make me happy and, since I have plenty of time to myself at the moment, the future is what I plan for. None of this really deters me from looking at new places to move to or what kind of new car I want to have in the near future. I think that thinking like this is what keeps me truckin' along through all of this. Every day that passes is one step forward for me.

My 2nd Birthday! Day Zero has finally arrived :)

Today was GO DAY for me. I've been waiting for this moment for a long time now. The actual transplant process was pretty uneventful. It only took about 45 minutes to transfuse me. It had a really weird smell, though, like canned spaghettios, which is fine with me. Better than cooked broccoli, boiled eggs or nursing homes. My parents came down and brought me an awesome Spongebob Squarepants balloon hooked to a Meerkat stuffed animal...very random and funny! I love surprises :) I couldn't hold my breakfast down this morning, but I managed to do fine for the rest of the day. My parents went and got fresh pizza for dinner and it was SCRUMPTIOUS. It was nice having them both here all day with me...I didn't expect that, really. Boredom can kick in really fast in a hospital room, believe it or not, but we chatted and surfed the net together and all that good stuff.

I'm so happy that the process is done and over with, but nervous about possible side effects that could pop up in the next week and a half. I was thinking today about how this whole time I was focused on the units and if they would find enough for me. Then I started pondering on why this beautiful opportunity even exists. One unit came from a male baby in Orange County, California and the other came from a female baby in France. It amazes me that, in such a joyful moment, both parents thought beyond themselves and chose to give the possibility of life to someone else. How beautiful is that? I'm a total stranger who means nothing to them, but they are giving me the opportunity to save my life through an act of love that had nothing to do with me. It is amazing, that in those moments that should be completely theirs, people find a way to think of others. I am blessed that they unknowingly gave me the opportunity to prolong my life. This option was pretty much it for me. If they didn't find cord blood matches, then I was stuck with a half match which most definitely would have more complications. And I don't like complications. So, considering everything, life is good.

Day Minus 1 = Rest Day

Character contributes to beauty. It fortifies a woman as her youth fades. A mode of conduct, a standard of courage, discipline, fortitude, and integrity can do a great deal to make a woman beautiful.
-- Author Unknown

So much for it being rest day. I didn't get much sleep last night and wasn't happy to be woken up this morning, but I sucked it up and got out of bed to get ready for the day. The normal parade of doctors, nurses, cleaning ladies, and food lady came through in the span of 2 hours and I was poked and prodded and questioned as usual. Torture is the term that comes to mind when I think of the daily morning hospital routine for each patient. I'm happy that, after morning, however, things normally slow down a little bit. I get to choose when I take a shower, brush my teeth and all that good stuff, without someone holding my hand or demanding me to do something right then. This allows me to feel like I at least get to keep a little bit of dignity and character. On that note: Antibiotics and I have a love/hate relationship. I love having protection, but I loathe frequent trips to the bathroom (and my bathroom is about the size of a closet under a stairway - shower included).

So the day started out with me being groggy, but going along with the swing of things. I was visited by 2 random women. One who is a 2 time breast cancer survivor who underwent treatment in the '70s (could you imagine?!). She's in love with Mike and has never met him...thinks he has great courage, humanity and a lot of love for me. and she's completely right. The other woman wanted to make sure I was mentally balanced and didn't need any help with controlling my craziness or depression. She deemed that I'm not crazy or depressed, but if I ever land there, she's my lady. I also was visited by a really sweet woman named Becky. She happens to be the best friend of my boyfriend's mother and she lives not very far away. I had a nice inspirational chat with her and am glad to know that someone so caring is near by.

I didn't leave my room much today. I can feel my counts dropping, and, in turn, my energy level slipping. I wasn't at all motivated to exercise today and left it for last so that hopefully all my energy would be used up and I would sleep peacefully all rolled up like a burrito in my blanket. Because I can feel the oncoming days of being more tired and less energetic, I pushed myself the hardest I have while being here and I feel pretty good and very tired. Unfortunately for the nurses, I forgot to put deoderant on today :) oh well. It's the least of their worries. They're just happy that I chose to shower on my own. Now it's time for my good 'ol friend Ambien, happy dreams, smiling about celebrating a new birthday tomorrow and being beautiful because I have character.

Thanks for all of the comments, by the way. I love reading what everyone has to say and it lets me feel connected to the outside world. Oh, and my address here is:

DUMC
9200 Erwin Rd., ABMT
Marie Opetaia-Williamson, Rm# 9204
Durham, NC 27710

Love,
Marie

Mr. Magoo & Ambien too...

My night nurse showed up like Mr. Magoo on crack. He started to talk to me like I was 2 and unable to comprehend everything going on around me. Needless to say, this slightly aggravated me. Well, as usual, around 3 in the morning, he came in to draw labs, check my vital signs and weigh me. For some reason he was all fidgety and couldn't figure out how to place the cap to draw blood from my lumen. Instead of starting all over or getting a new cap he pretended to draw labs, left without doing vital signs and then came back 30 minutes later to 'get one more blood sample'...this meaning he actually did what he was supposed to do the first time he came in and interrupted my beauty sleep. The man took an hour to do what most take 5 minutes to do. Now, after already taking an ambien to help me sleep, I've been wide awake since 3 am. Above depicts exactly how I feel about THAT. On the upside, a new shift begins in 3 hours and I shall be rid of Mr. Magoo for good. (BTW, he just randomly opened my door, said 'oops' and turned and walked away. I think he had the wrong room. Someone help me or him.)

therapy and a tan

While most of the rest of the world was slumbering, walking the dog, going to church or eating breakfast at noon, this Sunday (January 13)I checked into Duke University Medical Center. Weird choice. I know. But necessary. For those who know me, this was the beginning of my cord blood transplant treatment. It is now exactly a week later and, after 5 days of radiation I have a tan and and a killer upchuck reflex. Today was my last day of chemotherapy FOREVER...and for that I am extremely grateful. I celebrated by napping with Mike :)

So, I've been getting some food down, exercising some every day and hitting the 'nurse' button the moment my monitor starts beeping annoyingly. The doctor's think I'm doing great...for a cancer patient going through treatment. I feel alright most of the time and sometimes I don't feel so hot at all. My room is about the size of a cubicle, but, somehow, is still pretty comfy. My life as a patient feels about as dry as the inside of my mouth at the moment. BORING. I'm just waiting to get through all of this to the loveliness of cancer-free life on the other side. The big thing at the moment is waiting for the actual transplant this Wednesday. I'm nervous and excited all rolled up in one! The nurses consider transplant day my new birthday...so I guess now I can celebrate twice a year :)